Funny things i have heard lately---

Talia:He gave Melissa a bad grade cuz she asian.
Me: and he gave you a good grade cuz you black?

(note:i do go to East, and yes i speak ghetto, and no, i don't find it wrong or offensive because i am perfectly capable of correct grammar.

Jigi: I had a boyfriend in first grade who told me he loved me. He also told me he was the red power ranger.
(note:he obviously was lying because I am the red power ranger."

Me: Can i use your...wang,...that thing...shit...what the fuck's it called?
Mathias i think: Pencil?
(Note:I haven't gotten a whole lot of sleep lately.)

Simpsons, quoted by me(paraphrase):That was so bad it sucked and blew at the same time.
(Note: we have VJ auditions today that would have beat up Ghandi they were so mean.)

Corina:Mr. L? would you look at my project...Mr l? Mr L get your butt over here!
(Mr. L is my imposing, strict, and wonderfully sarcastic history teacher.)

Quote in the year book:"A security guard asked me if i was pregnant and i said, eh, everybody has bad days."

(note: what can i say?)